Going through my mother's belongings had stood still for a long time. We decided to start with something simple, documents. Years, decades, of bills, memberships, foster parenting letters, old credit cards, recipes, pictures, deeds, notes, medical papers and more were found. I sorted through all of the papers meticulously and shredded all of the old and impersonal papers. I thought to myself, "This is what is left.". A paper trail of many things my mother went through in her life felt so heavy. I knew it was time to let go but I couldn't just yet. I needed to keep this with me forever somehow. These tiny pieces of shredded paper felt like ashes to me. Ashes of trails once traveled. My entire body was covered in these papers of memories. It felt overwhelming all over again. Arguably millions of pieces of memories laid across my body, pressed into my skin, and in some ways filled my lungs. I laid there holding what felt like a lifetime.